When our daughter was born, me and my husband promised each other , that come what may..we shall never raise hands on her..how so ever she becomes notorious, fussy, stubborn, keeps bugging us...then also. Though I told him that sometimes it is required to raise hands if the kids are going out of control. On hearing this he said " Why do you think that our angel shall go out of control? Why do you have that feeling? " Hearing this, I said generally " Because kids do that, they are very naughty and they sometimes do not listen to their parents, so a small slap does not matter". He gave a gentle smile and said" We would never let that situation come. It is true that kids are naughty, do not listen to us, and we do get irritated sometimes and raise our hands on them. But how many times do we think that if we try to control our temper and try making them understand with examples, listen to them and try to make them calm...may be things would fall in place.Because the way we treat our children, they might copy us and think that beating or slapping is the best way to win and make the opponent shut"
I nodded my head and promised him that we shall keep our promise entire life.
One fine sunday, we planned for a picnic.. I was as usual buzy with packing the stuffs, especially for our angel and my dear husband was cooking dishes for us to carry. And at the same time, our daughter started to cry and throw things here and there, I could not understand why? I asked her.. and she said I am hungry and I want to have a candy. I tried to make her understand a lot that she should have something solid or else she shall again cry out of hunger. As candy is not a stomach filler. On listening this: she cried at her highest pitch and I lost my control and said " I see you are becoming very naughty...you are doing this because I do not slap you, so let me start this practise and then you shall start behaving in the right way".
She immediately turned to me and asked in a soft shivering voice " Mama, is beating a right thing?" I was speechless and did not know what to answer. I picked her up in my arms and hugged her. I was just out of words. I calmed her, gave her a candy in her mouth and said " No beta, beating is not a good thing and I shall never beat you. You should also not beat anyone?" Happily she went out to play....
My dear husband was watching everything, he came to me and said" I know that you are worried about her teeth decay and also about her tummy,but if you would have slapped her..then do you really think that she would have cried stopping or had something solid to eat?? May be things would have been worsened".
I sighed and said " Today a 5 year old taught me a lesson. It means that children learn a lot from our habits. And we have to be controlled and handle them tactfully and of course diplomatically".
Both husband and wife, together with each other's support can raise a child. When he loses his temper I calm him, and vice versa...because we live for our children. In today's tech era, when things are moving so fast and so our children's brain, we need to cope up with the delta factor that is in between the two generations...
No comments:
Post a Comment